Australian superstar Kylie Minogue has won a legal battle against celebrity Kylie Jenner. Jenner, whose primary claim to fame is as a peripheral member of the Kardashian clan, has appeared in reality TV show "Keeping Up With The Kardashians" and has a lucrative beauty and fashion business. But did she really think she could claim to be the original Kylie?
Girl, sit down and take some lessons.
1. Kylie Minogue was a successful television star 10 years before you were even born.
You've probably never heard of "Neighbours" because your parents hadn't even met when the original Kylie was killing it as Charlene. She won four Logie Awards (that's like the Emmy's of Australia) and, at age 19, was the youngest person to receive a Gold Logie.
2. Her first single, "The Locomotion" was the top-selling single in Australia in the 80s.
The entire 80s!
3. Seriously, you should be so lucky.
Her second single, "I Should Be So Lucky", was number one in the United Kingdom, Australia, Germany, Finland, Switzerland, Israel and Hong Kong, and gave her a second consecutive ARIA Award (read: Aussie Grammy).
4. Her debut album was actually titled "Kylie" and it spent more than a year on the UK album charts.
5. Her classic 80s duet with Jason Donovan, "Especially For You," sold over a million copies.
6. Kylie is so Kylie that she actually named two of her albums after herself -- her fifth album was titled "Kylie Minogue", just in case you missed the memo the first time.
7. She was singing with Nick Cave and Robbie Williams, performing at the Olympics, doing Shakespeare in Barbados and acting as the Green Fairy in "Moulin Rouge" -- all before you even got to preschool.
7. We haven't even gotten to her album "Fever" and her single "I Just Can't Get You Out Of My Head", which went to number one in 40 countries.
Try getting that out of your head.
8. When Kylie turned 40, her accolades included being named "Woman Of The Year" by both GQ and Glamour and getting an Order of the British Empire. She's not even British.
9. Madame Tussauds has had four waxworks of the pop star on display -- more than it's had for any other person except the Queen of England.
10. She's beaten breast cancer and is an advocate for cancer screening. Researchers in Australia found such a spike in breast cancer screenings after her diagnosis that they gave it a name -- "the Kylie effect".
11. The woman is about to release her 14th studio album and has a 2017 world tour planned. Her 14th album!
Are you really surprised your claim to the name was thrown out of court?