21/06/2018 11:52 SAST | Updated 21/06/2018 11:52 SAST

The Millennial Dating Dictionary: First There Was Ghosting, Then Breadcrumbing And Now Gatsbying...

And don't forget about lovebombing and cushioning... like, duuuh!

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Just when we thought we were keeping up with all millennial dating trends and their ever-expanding lexicon - in comes "Gatsbying" — courtesy of Australian model, Matilda Dods.

"You're out with your friends, you've got a glass of wine in your hand, you're laughing, your lipstick has worn off just the right amount, and your hair is cool-girl effortless. Pull out your phone and take a video that displays perfectly how fun, cute and carefree you are.

"Twenty minutes later you pull your phone out again, and immediately check to see if *they've* seen it. You know who *they* are. It is that guy or gal whose attention you're trying to get with the video you just posted. You also know what I'm talking about..."

"You, my dear, are Gatsbying," reads the model's latest column to Tomboy beauty.

To Gatsby someone means to post a video, picture or selfie to public social media purely for a love interest to see it, and hopefully say something.

And yes, the term was inspired by U.S. author F. Scott Fitzgerald's book, "The Great Gatsby". In the book, businessman Jay Gatsby throws extravagant events at his mansion to capture the attention of a woman he's long had the feels for.

According to Dods, people do this regularly when out and about, only on a much smaller scale.

And just in case you're a little behind with these terms, here are a few must-know millennial dating terms from the last year or so:


A dating technique where along with your main piece, you also have several 'cushions', other people you'll chat and flirt with to cushion the potential blow of your main break-up and not leave you alone, as defined by the Urban Dictionary.


This is leading someone on with no intent of following through. This might be in the form of an ex who continues to 'check in' with you, but doesn't indicate any intention to meet up. It may be a guy that you've been flirting with back and forth, who will disappear for weeks, and then send an ambiguous "hey, how're you" text.


When bae or potential bae drops over-the-top affection and gifts on you during the beginning of the relationship as an attempt to build trust. Psychologists have warned, however, that it can be a form of manipulation, intended to establish control over you in the long run.


When a person cuts off all communication with the person they're dating, with zero warning or notice beforehand. You'll mostly see them avoiding that person's phone calls, social media, and avoiding them in public.


Named after the fictional cartoon ghost, it's a friendly alternative to ghosting. Instead of ignoring someone, you're honest about how you feel, and let them down gently before disappearing from their lives, according to The Guardian.