One Facebook status. A snap. A 140 characters. This is all it takes for people to know that you are rubbish in bed. The rise of instant messaging and social media has meant that we can now.
Going viral has a whole new meaning when it comes to sex these days as was seen when a business man saw his scorned lover put his penis on twitter or even women who write blog posts about not wanting bad sex anymore. Discussing ones sex in a public forum, is increasingly becoming a widespread activity as more and more women have begun using the online space and instant messaging groups to discuss the orgasms they are (sometimes not) having.
This means that potential partners now have access to spread your exploits on an unprecedented scale and it is getting harder and harder to hide behind falsehoods and bravado. There is no other time when those who have been there can call you out on lousy sex/being a one-minute man/ a person who cannot find a clitoris with a compass.
Speaking to various men on the topic it would seem the same thing that stops men asking for directions when lost in the middle of nowhere is stopping them find out directions to women's orgasms.
And in a world of sex positivity, sex advice, social media and 'showing receipts' and people talking to their friends you shall eventually get caught out.
Picture this: a group of men sit in a bar. Someone has just called for the fifth round, eyes are getting glassy and the talk has momentarily moved away from football/politics and someone speaks about how they would give the waitress the night of her life. One of his friend's replies 'nah boy, according to Thembisa, who heard from Martha, you barely last five minutes and your foreplay game is weaker than the post Brexit pound.' A silence falls across the table and in a series of unfortunate events your metaphorical, eloquent friend just shames you and suddenly you have gone from an Adonis to that dude who masturbates with both hands for variety.
What is even more tragic is that there are some sitting around the table can go down on a woman so well that she calls him five minutes after he leaves the house to ask if maybe do his tax returns for free this year? There are those around the table who could have used his knowledge more than more stats about the Champions League.
This is a request for men to talk to your friends, create the space within your groups to speak about sex.
This is a request for men to talk to your friends, create the space within your groups to speak about sex. There is a potential wealth of knowledge behind the speak of politics, football, the stock market, funny online memes and whatever it is men discuss when in groups alone. There is the potential of that one man who has been with his woman for five years and she has taught him tricks you can only dream of. There is that man who roams the streets and has been getting enough sex to write a PHD on how to make a woman shake and the knees.
Then there are enough men out there who need to take a class or two (or sixteen). Who think foreplay is sending a message saying 'baby I am coming over to smash.' Who think that giving head is something that happens when you accidentally knock foreheads when you give a woman a hug. These are often the men who are most vocal about their sexual exploits.
And with all men must know there is always more to learn. Always one more tip or trick that could take your game to the next level, there is always one more Tinder date experience of a friend you could learn from. This is especially helpful for the men who insist on not asking their sexual partners, if you trust your boys, then ask them. Some may have some messed up advice, but some may have gold. Men should not be shy to gather and ask each other about sex, to support each other in the way they do in other areas. There is no shame in asking directions to orgasm city with an overpass through skills central.